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Showing posts from July, 2010
one more hit ... my foundation is cracked. i tried so hard to get at least that built strong, but with each crushing blow, it comes weaker, until it finally cracks. i thought i had come so far, but finally i came to realize that maybe i am not strong enough yet to finally build up my walls. one more crack ... my foundation is threatening to collapse. quickly i am struggling to hold on, to keep it from cracking again, from falling, only knowing that my strenght is vanishing as fast as my will to keep from everything tumbling over me. one more breath ... i give one last effort to hold out. my will is slipping, my strength is nearly gone. i no longer have any need to try anymore, even though i know if i give up, this beginnings of a wall, this weak facade will finally crumble, and i will be left in a lesser state ... one last moment ... and it's over. i lost. my foundation crumbles. i wasnt strong enough. and now, all that i have worked for is gone. i am left alone in this lesser, wea
shadows stretch across the page.... spidery writing covers the paper. a candle flickers. the table stretches into the dark. i try to finish reading the paper, but sleep threatens to overtake me. i set it aside and pick up the candle. the wax drips, falls into the holder. i walk slowly into my room, finding that the door is already closed. i open it gently and find him already in bed. i sigh, and put the candle down on the nightstand. i lay down in bed and blow out the candle. an arm reaches for me. i curl up next to my love and settle down for a calm night. i start to fall alseep in his arms as he mumbles 'i love you' in my ear.